Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize