if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize