what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
