Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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