your room smells of hookers.
And success
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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