Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
sex in a hospital.. check
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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