do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
