She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
