the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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