i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Randomize
