sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
jump out the window naked night went bad
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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