12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
He's on the porch naked. Help.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize