how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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