Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
