Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Randomize