All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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