do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
