Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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