Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
