nut hugger
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
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