I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
