yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
