Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize