Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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