i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
