hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
