im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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