So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
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