There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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