i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize