So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize