just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
