i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
