Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
