I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
