We won't sleep together?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
