Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
