I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
