Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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