so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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