We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
