Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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