he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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