Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize
