i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
