I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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