I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Your topless pictures make me question reality
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
