I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
