only if we run a train.
done.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
