real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
birth control should be required to get into college
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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