She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
