their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I skipped work to stalk him.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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