I've blown a few things in my day
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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